


Not there, not yet

by lilija_the_red



Series: one shots - photo inspired [3]
Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Bonding, Friendship, Gen, Therapy, self-hate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-19 06:18:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4735619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilija_the_red/pseuds/lilija_the_red
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Therapy in pictures. Cosette can help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not there, not yet

**Author's Note:**

> Third part! Good thing when you have a lot written out already, ha!
> 
> The picture that goes along with these words is :  
> http://36.media.tumblr.com/24b46a381d90dd8be5c70b902330626f/tumblr_mggs50Im5n1rozafdo1_500.jpg

“Cosette… Do we really have to do this?” Grantaire asks, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.   
He had started theraphy again. For his drinking problem, for his self hate - for his everything. He hasn’t told anybody.  
So of course he did tell Cosette.  
It went surprisingly well, though. Until now, because the newest assignment icked him too much. “Take photos of yourself and what your are the most troubled about.”  
“Facing the fear” they had called it. Fucking idiots. He had thought about doing one on his drinking problem, but Cosette had denied him that. She said, that that wasn’t the biggest problem, and he’d knew that. (‘It’s supposed to bring out your deepest secrets, the hidden fears. Everybody knows about your drinking problem, Taire. It’s not the thing you are hiding.’ Her voice has been soft and her smile comforting as she told him, but it still stinged. Especially because she had a point.) Unfortunately his therapist has had the same opinion on his fears, so the photoshoot with drinks and bottles was gone to waste.  
So here they are know, in Cosette’s apartment, a chair placed in the middle of the living room, white sheets plastered behind, creating the look of an photo studio. Cosette holds a camera in one hand, the other lying on his arm. She squeezes shortly before pulling it away.   
Her voice is soft but still sincere when she starts talking, the melodic sound that is her voice turning the words into a song. It’s comforting. “I can’t force you, Grantaire, but I believe this could help you. We can stop whenever you want to. But it’s only us. Nobody knows, nobody will come. Lets do it together, okay?” He has avoided her eyes, but now, he looks up. Her look is honest her eyes and lips smiling at him. He nods, not knowing if he can speak. “Shall we start?” He nods again. “Yeah”, he breathes out. “Good.” Her smile grows wider. “Then take off your shirt, we have work to do!” She grins holding up the camera. Grantaire laughs. It’s shaky and breahty but it’s a laugh.   
(Later when the photos are finished and they are going through it together, sitting curled around each other on Cosette’s couch, he looks at them sceptically.  
If the model hasn’t been him, he may have seen how beautifully his spine bent, how the freckles on his neck made it look like a night sky full of stars, he would see the beauty in the contrast of pale skin and inky hair. But the model is him and he doesn’t see it. Instead he sees the little scars on his back, ugly healed ones from an old accident when he was a teen. He sees a flood of freckles, too many freckles. Wild hair, that's far away from being pretty to look at. His posture seemed off. Maybe. At least not right. In short - He still can’t see anything beautiful or artistic about it. And he tells her.  
Cosette shakes her head, a small smile on her face “You’ll get there. Don’t worry.” She leans down pressing a kiss to his cheek. “And until then, we are here to remind you of that, 'kay?” Grantaire’s mouth moves into a half smile.  
He wishes desperately to believe her. But he’s not there yet. But maybe, maybe, one day he’ll get to see it. He hopes.)


End file.
